Mormor och morbror Seppo

LOVE

You were right there for me... always... I miss you like crazy grandma! I have to let you go now. I guess it´s so hard because you were always my best friend. I know what life is without you now, but I still cry for you sometimes. I guess this is goodbye. I have to say goodbye. I´ll see you later wherever you are. Love you so much. I´ll try to do what you wanted me to... It´s hard, but I´ll try. Will never, NEVER forget you!!! Bye......

Haven´t been so honest with myself the last few years. Haven´t dare to say what I feel, and what I needed to say. I´m so sorry I never told you I love you. I know you know I do... but still. Wish I had. You are the only person of your kind my dear uncle. I´m so sad you´re gone. Why did this happen? I don´t know how many times I´ve been crying over you. And I don´t think I´ll ever stop. With time I suppose it gets better and easier to deal with the fact that you´re not here anymore, and will never be here again. I wish I´d been stronger and showed you how much you mean to me. I will go see you at the grave, cause I think it´ll make it easier as well to understand. Mum said it´s getting easier every time, but it just got worse for me. Every time it reminds me you wont be back. But I have to accept this now. It´s time to move on. I will never ever forget you. This is the hardest thing to do right now. But I have to.... Miss you soo much. I wish this was only a bad dream... but I know it´s not. So..... here it comes.... I need to do this. Thank you for all the crazy times you gave me. You are one of the biggest reasons I am like I am. You gave me so many happy minutes, hours, days, weeks, months and years!!! Those are forever in my heart and will never go away. You can´t even imagine what you´ve done for me. You´ve given me comfort when I´ve been really sad. You´ve gone crazy when things have been a bit boring. You were the clown of the family. But still, very serious and loving dad to your lovely children. My heart will break again when I do this, but it´s time to start healing instead of digging a deeper and deeper hole of pain. I love you and will always do... but I´ll see you later some time. This is the time of goodbye... Crying like crazy when I´m writing this, but this is really goodbye. Off course you´ll still be in my mind, but hopefully only in good memories instead of all the painful missing. So... Bye.......

PS. If someone reading this don´t understand, this pain has been there since grandma died three years ago and my uncle two years ago. Time to move on now...

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